Thursday, August 02, 2007
Needles Are Fun!
I've been getting acupuncture, the centuries old Chinese medical treatment that involves (inhale deeply) long needles puncturing your skin. Devotees have sworn by the treatment's ability to solve everything from infertility (see Sex and the City Season 6) to an addiction to smoking.
I went to help with weight loss and I have to admit that it is slightly effective. But, I've learned that there is NO cure-all. Losing weight takes determination to change and dedication to an effective plan, above all. But I'm all about study guides and I think that all of that needling is just that. I've lost 4 pounds to date. I WILL lose more.
How does it work? The first time I went I reclined on a typical doctor's office bed and bared my tummy. Three ultra-long needles were stuck into my stomach before I even realized the process had started. The doctor turned off the light, flicked on what must have been the official Mah Jong soundtrack and left me alone for almost an hour. It wasn't painful, but it was a little uncomfortable, especially when I yawned and flexed my ab muscles. Ouch!
The most painful part came when he grabbed all three needles at once and took them out. Double Ouch! Then, if that wasn't enough, he stuck 5 tiny needles inside of my ear for me to "massage" when I got a craving. Umm, massage? Doc, whose humongo crack rocks are you smoking? It hurts to even sleep on these, let alone massage!
But, as they say, Weight loss is pain, oh wait, is that not right? Whatever. You know what I mean.
Til Next Time,