Sunday, September 09, 2007

Cultural Swaggerjackers: Beyonce Wants to be A Goat!

Beyonce wants to be Latina now that she's in Latina magazine. She's dumb, gullible and a bona fide publicity whore, but she's not the first to attempt to jack another culture. Because she's Black, oh excuse me, Creole, she is having a hell of a time trying to pull it off.

Latina magazine quoted her saying, “I’m just jealous that I wasn’t born Latina. I wish I had been because the culture is so beautiful.”, the online leg of the magazine, recently titled an article about her crossover attempt "Beyoncé and Other Wannabe Latina Divas."

The levels of ridiculousness can not be justifiably explained in this blog format. Suffice it to say that:

1) She needs to endure another round of media training.
2) She doesn't know who she is or what she wants to be. When Essence interviews her she is gushing about the beauty of Black women. If Hebrew Life magazine ever calls she'll attest to her lifelong ambition to learn Hebrew and visit the Holy Land.

After Bossip posted the quote a commenter accurately wrote that :

I think if Beyonce were talking to [...] 'Goat Weekly'..she would have been like, I wish I were a goat."

3) It's completely offensive. I mean we all know that Justin Timberlake tries his best to get as close to Black as he can get without getting constant harassment from the police but do you see him running around saying he wants to be Black? NO, because he (or his publicist/managers/etc) have enough sense to see that it's offensive. You don't have to be Latina to sell albums in Spanish, B.

Moreover, if Essence or VibeVixen or any other magazine for Black women deigned to call Beyonce a wannabe anything, the powers that B would swoop down from their publicity trees like "WooKaa!" I am certain that because they are published for the lighter sistas, las hermanas if you will, they have license to say whatever they want about Black women.

Trust, Christina Aguilera did not get the same treatment from them after her Spanish album. In fact, they named her their Entertainer of the Year in 2000 and attempted to drag Vibe through the mud after booting her off of the cover for Bobby Brown (read here). Sure she has a Spanish surname but has just as few ties to any kind of Hispanic culture as Beyonce. Repeat for Jessica Alba and Cameron Diaz.

The moral of this story? Beyonce should refrain from speaking and it's absolutely OK to say anything about Black women.


Melissa said...

Oh Whitney, I love it! I wondered if anyone else saw Beyonce not only walking the line but slowly edging into another culture on the low. Hey B, fyi, you can't suddenly become Latina because you're hair is kinda straight and you think they're cool. You can admire without wanting to become an entirely different ethnicity. Yeah, a brush up on the PR wouldn't hurt.

Mademoiselle M said...

lol at you AND melissa

Brittany Teal said...

Billy goat's gruff!!!